YLYL possibly going to hell edition.

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Be me, 6'5" 250 lbs country as fuck redneck that lives 10 miles from the nearest town, 2 miles from the nearest neighbor sitting on beanbag chair in living room of double wide whilst eating a cherry Popsicle and watching longmire on netflix, got a semi bc vic makes the spaghetti roll... Hear car pull into driveway wtf it's 3AM look out window shitty 80's Oldsmobile wagon pulled into yard 3 teens in full "scary" clown costumes step out, there's been a string of thefts on nearby farms, figure it's connected. Throw on pair of jungle boots and cowboy hat, leaving the rest in the nude and grab Draco AK pistol on the way out the door. Can see they are sneaking around by my other trailer(there is two on my property, use other one for storage but it has more lights on and looks more lived in.) Sneak up behind them then jump behind the biggest one, whom I am a solid 7 inches taller than. Was gonna yell "wanna die?" or "What the fuck?" but brain went full autist and combined the two so yell "wanna fuck?"
All three turn around to see a 6'5" overweight redneck wearing nothing but a cowboy hat and combat boots carrying an AK with lipstick-red lips that just asked them if they wanna fuck. Look down and realize all the adrenaline turned the semi into a throbbing, precum-leaking full on. Never seen anyone run that fast in my life
mfw
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Side note that wasn't actually me in the hilarity above, If it was(more of an AR guy) prolly would have looked like...
Ramboner.JPG
 

Ohio.george

Insane Grower
View attachment 93527
Be me, 6'5" 250 lbs country as fuck redneck that lives 10 miles from the nearest town, 2 miles from the nearest neighbor sitting on beanbag chair in living room of double wide whilst eating a cherry Popsicle and watching longmire on netflix, got a semi bc vic makes the spaghetti roll... Hear car pull into driveway wtf it's 3AM look out window shitty 80's Oldsmobile wagon pulled into yard 3 teens in full "scary" clown costumes step out, there's been a string of thefts on nearby farms, figure it's connected. Throw on pair of jungle boots and cowboy hat, leaving the rest in the nude and grab Draco AK pistol on the way out the door. Can see they are sneaking around by my other trailer(there is two on my property, use other one for storage but it has more lights on and looks more lived in.) Sneak up behind them then jump behind the biggest one, whom I am a solid 7 inches taller than. Was gonna yell "wanna die?" or "What the fuck?" but brain went full autist and combined the two so yell "wanna fuck?"
All three turn around to see a 6'5" overweight redneck wearing nothing but a cowboy hat and combat boots carrying an AK with lipstick-red lips that just asked them if they wanna fuck. Look down and realize all the adrenaline turned the semi into a throbbing, precum-leaking full on. Never seen anyone run that fast in my life
mfw
View attachment 93533
I wept when Longacre was over.😪
 
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